Bonus: 1993 Covered Wagon President's Message

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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The purposes of the Shasta Historical Society are to collect and preserve knowledge about the continuing history of Shasta county and, when appropriate, of adjoining areas; To maintain a depository of such historical material to serve as a research library for its members; And to spread the knowledge of local history for the education and enjoyment of the public.

Recently a local businessman had occasion to visit the Society's library. There he was greeted by the sight of five people in a cluttered, 16-foot square room, working elbow to elbow on different tasks in perfect concentration and harmony. He later told me that he was so stunned by this intense atmosphere that it took him several moments to collect his thoughts and state his reason for being there.

No doubt, at first glance, we appear to be a random collection of frenetic, self-absorbed elves all doing our own thing. But after watching for a while it becomes evident that it this more like quilting bee: we see a group of highly-motivated, able people, each working on one part of the design, and all contributing their ideas on what the final product should be.

Since the Society was established in 1930, we have stuck pretty close to the basic pattern in our mission statement. However, we have had to add and rearrange pieces as we evolved from a social group to a real community resource. Now as we stand back and look, we can see areas that need to be filled in. Access to our collection needs to be more user-friendly. Our programs could be improved. We should be more involved in our community. And the good news is that we have resources available to work on these areas.

What have we done since June, 1992 when the last Covered Wagon was issued?

• We obtained a grant to publish a book of photos from our collection in fall, 1993 (it's now in preparation);
• We funded a small college scholarship in memory of Miss Veronica Satorius;
• We added a third computer to our library to simplify access to our collection;
• In partnership with Trinitarianus Chapter, E Clampus Vitis, we sponsored an interpretive sign at the new Tower House bridge in the National Park Service Whiskeytown Recreational Area; and
• In early 1993, we hired our first employee, Wayne Rich, to work in our library at the Redding museum and hopefully add some continuity to our volunteer operation.

It is hard to predict what other opportunities will have shown up by the time you read this (it's being written in January because of press deadlines). The projects above didn't happen by themselves just because the Board of Directors approved them - worthwhile things get done only when capable people do them.

So if you subscribe to our mission statement, this is your invitation to phone, write or visit us at the museum. It's always nice to see a new face (or an old one) and to hear new ideas.

- Bert T. Walsh
President

Political Correctness (January 1997)

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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Politically correct? In Shasta County?

It strikes us that we are passing up a good deal of humor because it would offend some segment of our membership. What we need is some community that can be slandered without giving offense to any of our readers. Right off the bat we can write off ethnic origins and go directly to locations in Shasta County.

We considered Montgomery Creek, Platina. Ono, Cottonwood, Sims and Oak Run. However, we decided to be a little discreet; those folks can get a little testy when insulted. We can't even use a place that isn't on the map any more, because somebody`s forebear might have been born there. Finally we narrowed things down between Gibson and Conant.

We picked on Conant because it is a classier place. It has its own freeway offramp, one house and an old cemetery that is best visited during the winter months when the poison oak has died down. I am sure that William R. Conant had great plans for the place, but they seem to have proceeded very slowly. Now, to illustrate what can be done with this politically neutral location, we present for your edification a  smattering of "Conant" jokes. To challenge our readers, we list the lead-ins first and the punch lines, arranged out of order, next. The challenge is to find the punch line that best fits the lead-in. Go to it, gang.

• They have a lot of trouble with the plumbing in Conant, because...
• The president of the Conant Historical Society was recently awarded a gold medal...
• The high school principal used to live in Cottonwood, but he moved to Conant last year...
• Where is Conant's 911 dispatch center? 
• Why can't you get newspaper delivery in Conant?
• What's black & white and sleeps two?
• How can you tell who the mayor of Conant is?
• How do they get the kids out of the swimming hole at dinnertime?
• Why did they have to cancel the Christmas pageant?

• It's too hard to throw uphill from the freeway.
• He is the fellow wearing a clean John Deere cap.
• They just throw in a cake of soap.
• It was impossible to find three wise men.
• It drains uphill.
• Her husband had it bronzed.
• The Conant City police car.
• The pool hall in Castella.
• It raised the level of intelligence in both places.

P. S. In case we have managed to offend someone in Conant in spite of our diligent efforts, we will be glad to make amends by offering him/her a free subscription to our Newsletter.

--BTW

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Membership (May 1996)

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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Here is a fascinating item gleaned from the Question & Answer column of our favorite newspaper: The official Betty Boop Fan Club was founded in l980, has 400 members and sends out a yearly newsletter.

Think about this. Our Society was founded in 1930 and has nearly one and a half times the membership. Is this because we are older? Or is Shasta County history possibly more interesting than 1930s cartoons? Maybe our Newsletter and/or our programs are more interesting. Perhaps our mission statement is more inspiring, our leadership more farsighted and our members more culturally astute. I'll have to think about this for a while.

Meanwhile, if you find that your loyalties are divided, the address of the Betty Boop Fan club is given as 12350 Marshall Avenue, Chino, CA 91710-2523; the phone number is (714) 628-0399.

--BTW

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Note: The Official Betty Boop Fan Club above is no more. It is now less of a club, and more a merchandise platform, run by Fleischer Studios (the character was created by Max Fleisher), as well as on popular social media platforms: https://www.bettyboop.com/. 

The Meaning of Life, continued (April 1996)

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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We hardly ever go to the movies any more. There doesn't seem to be much point since we lost John Wayne and Maureen O'Hara. It seems easier to sit at home and use the TV channel selector to search for the true Meaning of Life.

However, last month in protest against the sex, violence and really depressing local newscasts on TV we thought we would take in a movie, Things sure have changed. Why, the first thing I noticed is that they sell popcorn in something that looks like a five-gallon pail. Not only that; it seems they have five or ten different movies going on at the same time. Fortunately they show them in different rooms. This minimizes the confusion, although not entirely. A person still has to find the right room and then remember which one it is every time the popcorn bucket needs refilling.

Later on it occurred to me that this was the ideal way to handle Society meeting programs after we have increased membership from 600 to 6000 folks. On any typical meeting day, we would have several programs going at once. We might have a Seminar on the True Meaning of Life, a rescreening of my daughter`s wedding with film clips of our grandson spliced in, the ultimate Jean Beauchamp slide show, "Over the South Pole by Balloon," and warming up on the runway at Anderson International Airport would be a chartered 797 ready to whisk us off on an afternoon tour of the Overland Trail from Missouri to California.

How about it, gang-are you ready for the Future? 

--BTW

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Demographics (March 1996)

 This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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I kind of enjoy getting up to our place in the hills. Part of the fun is the ride up the county road. This time of year it's nice to see the new calves and lambs, and with the cattle down on winter range, one can watch the cowboys doing their thing. It's also interesting to see whose rig is parked at whose place and to speculate what sort of mischief they might he up to. With county elections coming up, it is instructive to note the "VOTE FOR" signs on gate posts--sort of an unofficial political poll. (There ought to be a pun here about polled Herefords/Heryfords, but I'm not sure how to work it in) The FOR SALE signs are also worth noting. They can give a reading on the economy. 

The dog enjoys this too; she knows just where to bark and raise a fuss and sucker other dogs into chasing the car. And then there is the recognition game--whoever spots an oncoming neighbor and waves first wins. 

I suppose that folks have been doing this sort of thing for as long as there have been towns, mines, farms, ranches and roads thereto. This is kind of a link with the past, and a lot more fun than using the freeway.

I thought it was interesting when Jack Haner took a pig to the Fair. However, he has nothing on our Marilyn Carter, who brought her pig (pot belly) to the Museum. She encountered a problem-the museum attendants couldn't decide how much admission to charge. That's a real shame...

Marilyn is the new Publications Sales & Distribution czar (czarina?). We haven't found a job for the pig yet, though his name did come up for consideration by the Nominating committee. 

--BTW

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Database Enhancement Program (December 1995)

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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This month, in this space, we are proud to unveil our new Database Enhancement Program designed to radically revitalize your Society. 

How does it work? Simplicity itself. Every one of our 600 members will send out 10 letters to friends and acquaintances asking them to send $12.50 to join the Society. With 100% cooperation we should gain 6,000 new members. Carrying this forward one step, if every one of the 6,000 new members writes to 10 other individuals asking them to send $12.50 to one of the original 600 members we will have 600 new historical societies each with 100 members.

Beyond this the math gets kind of difficult, but the implications are staggering. With 66,600 active historians in the area, setting up and scheduling meetings could become a problem. However, on the plus side, the Covered Wagon would start to look like the National Geographic, Viacom would show nothing but the History Channel, and no doubt we would pick up at least 20 more volunteers.

OK, gang, you have caught the vision, so let's whip out those ball-point pens and start writing our friends and neighbors. 

--BTW

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Happy Thanksgiving (November 1995)

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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Happy Thanksgiving! The Horsetown Improvement Society is planning a Thanksgiving Dinner for the homeless. The main course will be an emu roasted in the Briggsville lime kiln. There is some controversy over recipes for stuffing. Would pine nuts work instead of chestnuts? Can acorn meal be used to thicken the gravy? Address all suggestions to the Society, "Attention: Gloria."

--BTW

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Note: This was an "inside" joke: Gloria Clark was the long-suffering wife of Dr. Gene Clark, who organized the Horsetown-Clear Creek Preserve at the site of the first gold discovery in Shasta County. [MRW]

Pig (October 1995)

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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It seems that a farmer was taking a pig to the livestock exhibit at the fair when he had a fender bender and had to get his truck to the garage. Jack Haner happened to be passing by and he offered to take the pig on down to the fair. The very next day the farmer spotted the pig riding around with Jack and naturally asked what was going on. Well, it turned out that Jack and the pig had such a good time at the fair that they decided to take in a ball game the very next day. 

--BTW

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The Bridges of Shasta County (September 1995)

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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Well, it's been quite a summer. Way back in June, I decided that the 1996 Covered Wagon really needed an artistic photo essay on the bridges of Shasta County. So first crack out of the barrel, I strapped a camera around my neck and took off cruising around in my truck.

You know I had forgotten just how friendly people are. The first place I stopped to ask about picturesque old bridges, the lady couldn't think of any, but she asked me in for punch and cookies while she thought some more. Well, she never thought of any but we sure had a great time talking. 

I tried another place the next week and would you believe that almost the same exact thing happened. The lady there was very helpful and friendly. She couldn`t think of any old bridges, but her goodies were delicious.

Gosh, that's just the way it went all summer. I got acquainted with a whole bunch of real nice ladies who are just fascinated with old bridges and stuff. but I never got to take even one picture. Somewhere along  the way I misplaced my good sun hat and Hillary's camera. I think it was at that place where the lady baked some kind of herbs in her brownies. Gosh, I wish I could recall where that was. 

--BTW

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Curation (May 1995)

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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Among recent additions to our library is a collection of "Wanted" posters that were prominently displayed in post offices all over the country. This was a gift from an anonymous donor who stated that the collection included his ancestors for the last six generations.

In accordance with current museum conservation practice, the posters have been mounted on flypaper and sealed in Saran Wrap. They were then sorted in accordance with the various crimes committed. As a matter of interest, we have six boxes of cattle thieves, but only two of bigamists. This is an interesting commentary of what our forebears considered important enough to prosecute during the formative years of our country.

The collection is of significant value to genealogists. For example, on just one rainy afternoon your editor was able to document his family tree all the way back to colonial times. 

--BTW

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Hybridization, Part 2 (April 1995)

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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Awhile back one of our members, a noted authoress, mentioned that she had spotted what appeared to be a two-legged pig with feathers near the Whitmore Fire Hall. Right away I sensed that this was something out of the ordinary that might be interesting to our readers. So I made a point of discussing this with some of the naturalists from the Horsetown-Clear Creek Preserve, and we uncovered a fascinating story.

Evidently Mother Nature has managed (Lord knows how) to breed a turkey with a wild boar. These beasts are quite shy and are rarely seen. However, during mating season they produce a distinctive call that has been compared to that of a coyote trapped in a washing machine. The "borkey's" main diet consists of digger pine cones and mashed acorns. The taste of the meat is difficult to describe; it has to be experienced.

These animals can be domesticated and raised just like any other livestock. But because they roost in trees, they have to be herded with a helicopter. Also one has to be very cautious when roping them. Early on there were some really bad accidents when the loop got caught in the rotor blades and the cowboys didn't think to let go. 

--BTW

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James McSheehy (March 1995)

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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Moving momentarily away from our area, I would like to share some remarks made by San Francisco Supervisor James McSheehy, circa 1918 to 1941. As McSheehy once said, "These are crouched in language which is perfectly oblivious."

"It has all the earmarks of an eyesore."

"You are putting the horse before the cart."

"Ladies, I have here some figures which you can carry in your heads, which I know are concrete."

"I may have been ill and unable to attend meetings, but no one has a right to say I've been incumbent."

Gosh, if James is till around, I wonder if he would like to write the newsletter.

--BTW

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Setting Fence Posts (February 1995)

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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Recently I had occasion to drive a row of metal fence posts into the ground. After the January rains this turned out to be easy work. However, digging holes for the corner posts was like trying to bail sludge with a round-point shovel. That job will have to wait 'til the ground firms up and then we can stretch the wire in July after the ground has set up like concrete. Whoever said that there is a time and place and season for everything really had it right--at least in regard to Shasta County soil conditions.

Maybe this also applies to what the Society does. Back in the 1970s whenever we received a request for information, it was brought up at a general meeting and someone would volunteer to come up with an answer-usually from memory. Today, we outfield one or two phone calls per day. About 20 or 30 people per month show up at the library with notebooks to do serious research, and Hazel McKim somehow manages to stay ahead of the questions that come in by mail. No doubt about it-there is increased public interest in local history, and we are at the right place with the right stuff at the right time. Now if we can continue to attract the right volunteers to help us do our thing, we may yet get organized.

--BTW

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This Newsletter (January 1995)

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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We have had a peek at a letter from Bob Stone of the Sacramento Canyon turnpike Stones) questioning the validity of a claim that the first woman to set foot on the summit of Mt. Shasta was Mrs. N. H. Eddy, on September 9, 1856. Bob points out that the first of three Eddy children was born on October 7, 1856, and marvels at Mrs. Eddy's stamina. Thank heaven the letter was not addressed to  us. I don't feel that we could have provided a reasonable historic or medical opinion.

Your mind is like a parachute. It's useless if it is not open.

Wayne and I have a secret pal and it's fair to say that without her contributions, the content of this newsletter would be even more incomprehensible to a normal person. 

The way it works is like this: I write down everything we think ought to be said, plus some nonsense to fill up the blank space. Then Wayne keyboards it into the machine with the screen, and puts little boxes and cartoons around the important stuff so the reader knows what to read. After that the machine prints the thing out and then the real work begins. At this point someone has to go over the whole thing and frown a lot and put in all the periods, commas, colons, and semicolons that are necessary to give meaning to everything we said.

Sometimes the spelling has to be corrected too. And then as a final touch we take out and add apostrophes--and I'm blessed if I know why. Changing those little marks around doesn't make things any easier to understand. They must be like neckties. People use 'em even though they are of no earthly use. Using apostrophes is like riding a bicycle--if you get it right the first time then you never forget how. On the other hand, I have problems with apostrophes, neckties, bicycles, skunks, and sometimes even horses. Oh! (",:/?':-")--Thank goodness for our secret pal!

--BTW

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The "secret pal" was none other than Madge, his wife, who among other things, wielded a mean read pencil while still keeping his humor intact.

Fancy Coffee (December 1994)

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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If it isn't one darn thing it's another. Seems like nobody in the world drinks coffee anymore. One may sip Espresso, Cappuccino, Latte, or Mocha nowadays but coffee is not politically correct unless it is double strength, tastes like candy, and has suds on top. So in order to stay current on this fad, we are proud to offer our readers the following simple gourmet beverage recipe:

To one cup of water add 3 spoons of Instant Sanka and the same quantity of Ovaltine. Cook in the microwave until it splatters, and top with a dab of Kool Whip. You like it with foam on top? No problem! Just drop in an Alka Seltzer tablet. Enjoy.

--BTW

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Hybridization (November 1994)

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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There is something strange going on here and I am at a loss to explain it. You may have noticed that Wayne has discovered a way to manipulate the desktop publishing program so that the newsletter is in a two-column format instead of just printing from left to right on the paper as we did in school. This looks neat and professional--just like a newspaper and most other newsletters. But for some reason when we print all the news in the two-column format there is space leftover. Why is this??We have the same amount of stuff and the same size of paper. The trigonometry of the thing just escapes me.

But here's a public service announcement that should take up the extra space:

Scientists have come up with a way to cross Hereford cattle with an ostrich. The real challenge here was to find a bull with a lot of imagination and a really good-natured bird. Blindfolding them is a good idea. This produces a great meat animal; half white meat and half lean beef with drumsticks like you wouldn't believe.

The Herefrich has very, very long legs so they can move from place to place in nothing flat. This saves the trouble and expense of moving them by trailer. The tough part is retraining your cattle dogs. They have to be taught to operate a motorcycle in order to keep up with the herd.

Next month we plan to tell you how to train buffalo as household pets. If you start working with them early on, they can be taught to catch mice. 

---BTW

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President Emeritus, Or The Meaning of Life (October 1994)

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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My hamster died when it fell into a bucket of varnish.

It was a sad end but a fine finish.

Being a president emeritus is really lots of fun. Now that the dust has settled, I find that I've got one whole extra day every week available for contemplating the meaning of life.

Now some people meditate in front of TV screens or stare into barroom mirrors or computer screens. My particular thing is getting away to our place in the hills. After taking care of the minimal chores, it's nice to pour a cup of coffee and sit outside on the bench by the door where it's quiet and peaceful, look at the trees and try to discover the meaning of life.

But just when I've managed to get it all resolved, I fall asleep and when I wake up I've forgotten what it was. 

So I'm taking the easy way out. The circulation of this newsletter is over 600 families, and I'm sure that someone somewhere has hit on the true meaning of the universe. We need a program for the January meeting; I'm sure one of our readers could do a bang-up illustrated go-minute talk on the Purpose of Life as We Know It.

All you have to do is show up. We can provide an easel or slide projector and refreshments. If you would like an advance announcement in the newsletter, just let Wayne know. See you there. 

Geological Perturbations (continued) 

Now we all know that State Highway 299 West runs generally in a westerly direction. However, where it passes through old Shasta it tends in a northwesterly direction. This can be confusing, because a local inhabitant will swear to you on a stack of bibles that Whiskeytown is north of Shasta. This local orientation is hard to get used to and communication can become difficult.

This phenomenon is known as the Middle Creek Magnetic Discombobulation. It is said to be caused by something they put on the hamburgers at Jay Birds Cafe.

--BTW

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A Puzzlement (June 1994)

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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???Puzzlement??? The record tells us that in 1932 a bronze tablet commemorating Major Reading's discovery of gold was set on a boulder at the northwest end of the old Highway 99 bridge across Clear Creek.

Imagine our surprise when we located this monument well south of the creek at the intersection of Canyon Road and the entrance to the Wintu Indian Bingo Facility. There have been some fascinating geological aberrations in our county's history: Outhouses have been overturned--tombstones, survey markers, fences and roads have occasionally shifted positions. But never a 5-ton boulder. Could this be the work of extraterrestrial beings, or perhaps gangs from Southern California?

Actually this puzzlement is due to random displacement along the Market Street Geological Rift. This will also explain why Highway 299 West enters town on Eureka Way and 299 East leaves town on Lake Boulevard a mile or so to the north.

--BTW

Note: Turns out there were two monuments, and our source mixed up their locations. The one on the northwest side of Clear Creek commemorated Bell's Bridge and was removed when a new building on Eastside Road dislocated it. The monument for Reading's gold discovery was and is southwest of the creek as described. A new plaque and monument is to be dedicated at the discovery site five miles upstream in May, 1998, during the California Sesquicentennial celebration.

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Math (May 1994)

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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Being of a mathematical turn of mind, I was musing the other evening and wondering how many generations of` Historical Society members each family unit could claim. Now we know that the society was founded in l930 by individuals old enough to have had grown families; so, let's assume that a new generation occurs every 20 years. This is reasonable, considering that births in Shasta County seem to occur early on and often. My golly, it's possible that we could have fourth generation members or even fifth generation. Without thinking too hard, I can come up with several third generation folks, and I have only a nodding acquaintance with local breeding permutations and begats.

Hey, let's have a contest to see who can boast of the most generations of Historical Society members! The winner will receive a free State lottery scratcher. In case of a tie, no prizes will be awarded. 

As historians, we can tolerate a reasonable amount of falsehood and exaggeration. And if you want to purchase memberships for your children at birth or even during the second trimester, the Treasurer has no problem with that. Simply mail your entries to the Society marked "Attention Incoming President."

--BTW

Note: The incoming president was Don Moore.

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Dues and Other Trivia (April 1994)

This post is part of a series of editorials written by Bert Walsh during his tenure as president and past president of the Shasta Historical Society. Readers are advised that his humor is often irreverent and rarely politically correct. 

Click here for the table of contents for the entire collection of his editorials.

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Once upon a time it seemed like we lived from payday to payday, and we owed more than we were worth. The good news was that we were not bothered too much by folks wanting help with worthy causes and neat business propositions. But just as soon as it became obvious that we could afford two kids and a dog, it seemed like every con artist and pest in the world moved in on us. I suppose this is why we have never discussed the Society's finances much. Life's a lot simpler if folks think you are poor. 

Every month Fred Becker puts together a four-page financial report. These are on file in the library if you like numbers. If you are willing to forego half and hour of crunching numbers, here's about what's happening: 

• Your dues pay for newsletters, programs, supplies, insurance, postage and members' copies of the Covered Wagon.
• Publication sales are paying the printing bill for new publications,
• To take care of big ticket items like Wayne's paycheck, scholarships, and historical markers, we have had income from two endowments for about a year and a half. These are set up so we cannot touch the principal. However, we can cut a fairly wide hog on the interest, which is paid once a year. To even out our cash flow, we park our annual income in interest-bearing mutual and money-market funds and draw off money from these as needed. 

After operating this way for about a year and a half, we have more $'s than when we started. So we are probably not as dumb as our newsletters might suggest. On the other hand, we should be spending more $'s and effort in support of our mission. We will be putting our 1994-1995 budget together pretty soon and want to include any projects you have in mind and are willing to put effort into. We don't lack for money, but we sure could use more unpaid talent.

I guess the most striking thing that has happened this month was the feedback we got from my mention of the Backwater Development Corporation. Several long-time Democrats suggested with some good humor that I give the G.O.P. equal exposure. Now the only reason I picked on President Bill was that I could identify with a good-looking hunk complete with a foxy wife and a liking for junk food. Identifying with George and Barbara Bush I'm afraid is just not in the cards--too much of a stretch.

But don't give up hope. I do believe that if we work on it, we can quite likely come up with a Ron and Nancy thing. They seem more like our kind of people. Once I get used to falling asleep at meetings and figure out that I'm married to "Mommie," I think that I can safely say that at no time did I attend a meeting with Colonel North. 

--BTW

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